How I explained to my toddler that her baby brother has special needs

I was lying down in bed with my three-year old daughter Olivia and we were playing with Miguel when she asked me, “Mommy, is he a doll?” I was surprised. I asked her why she thought that about her brother and she said, “Because he doesn’t walk. He doesn’t talk. So, he is a doll.”

12339285_10153728639632567_1267411308750043594_oHonestly, I was caught off guard. I really didn’t know what to say. I thought that all my children have already understood what was going on with their baby brother. I was wrong. Although my toddler knows there’s something wrong with her brother, she really doesn’t understand why he’s not walking, talking or even playing with her.

I knew then that I had to explain to her why. But how could you explain to a toddler that her brother has global developmental delay? Or that he has microcephaly? What can her tiny mind understand?

I realized that I just needed to tell her that her brother is different. That everyone is different. I told her that Miguel is different the same way she’s different from her older sisters. She loves singing while her older sister Elaina loves writing. Sofia likes drawing.

I then told her that there are kids like Miguel who takes longer time to learn how to walk or to talk. Then she quipped, “Oh, that is why Courtney is coming to the house, to help him walk!” Courtney is Miguel’s physiotherapist. “But when will he walk?” she asked.

I said, “Baby, we’ll have to wait until he’s ready.” I then hugged her and said, “We just have to be patient. In the meantime, let’s give him lots of love and that will surely make him learn faster.”

She hugged Miguel and said, “I love you.”


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